spin around this garden of hope ;
Monday, October 16, 2006 @ 2:52 AM
ive found out that... everyone at my (prev) working place knows about it now. :'( how am i going to face anyone? i never ever thought that i'll land myself in such a situation. i cant believe things have spread so far now. it only takes a pair of ears and a mouth to get a gossip travelling farrr. how am i going to face anyone of them? im as good as condemned.
if all my friends know about it, i'll really reallyy not have anyone left to be there for me. everyone will just leave me and look at me with judgemental eyes. i know that the past cannot be erased..but i really meant to repent my sins and never ever to do it again. i cried so badly because of it, and i truly hope things will be alright again. but now more and more people are knowing about it :( ahhhHH!!
once again, i feel as if no matter how things have changed now, your past will always leave a black mark in ur life. why cant we be thoroughly forgiven by men? thankfully, God forgives and he knows in our hearts that we truly meant to repent.
i know how much it hurts God when i repeatedly did the thing, without consideration for his feelings. but.. because of his mercy and grace, he gave me many chances to confess and repent of those horrible sins. now i will no longer do it again.. but it seems that ive lost many other precious people and their trust.
if all my friends know about it, i'll really reallyy not have anyone left to be there for me. everyone will just leave me and look at me with judgemental eyes. i know that the past cannot be erased..but i really meant to repent my sins and never ever to do it again. i cried so badly because of it, and i truly hope things will be alright again. but now more and more people are knowing about it :( ahhhHH!!