spin around this garden of hope ;
Tuesday, October 03, 2006 @ 11:12 PM
hmmm. `feeling troubled lately. i wonder why... especially since its suppose to be the holidays. but sigh. it's gonna end soon. the only 2 things i look forward to are 1. my beloved friends (: and 2. my darling children (:
im so afraid that i cant cope with the projects and all that lesson plans. its totally nerve-racking for me. sigh sigh. 
hmmm. something happened yesterday, and its been on my mind every single troubling second.
how is it possible that someone who hardly knows you, will say he likes you, all of a sudden? i totally dun believe in such stuffs. besides, i dun even see anything good in myself. bleah* he totally scared me. i didnt even know wat to say.. luckily ive no webcam. but he looked a little upset.
love is a trap. people in love are blind..in some way. haha.
sigh. wat should i do? i dun want to hurt him. hmm. we going donate blood next week... cos he asked me along. haha.
hmmm. maybe if he was tall, dark and handsome..i would have considered giving him a chance. wahaha.
sigh. watever it is, having gone through those past experiences, i no longer place much hope in that four letter word. . .
love really does change you. in the attempt to change the person you love, you'll gradually see a change in yourself as well. and everything never is the same again...
perhaps its only the memories that'll still bind us together, no matter how big the change is...
hmm..moving on to something else: im having lots of difficulties teaching tuition to my primary 4 boy. he certainly is giving me hell of a time each time i go his house. his SA2 is only a week away and he hardly even put in effort in his work.
im always feeling demoralised whenever we have tuition. he calls me stupid! at least 10 freaking times within that 1.5 hours. and that's not all.. he also calls me dumbwit, retarded, ugly duckling, idiot, 'ben dan' (stupid in chinese) etc etc. AHHH! so sad can.
and yet... i dun know how to defend myself. well, i suppose that's the worst rights. sigh. help help.
dun hurt me. cos i dun wish to hurt you either...
